My Life as a Bum
When I first came to MindComet there were talks about doing a bum sign generator for a viral campaign. Since I hadn't shaved for a few days and had long hair I knew that I looked sort of bummy at the time. So I decided to volunteer myself to dress up as the bum for the campaign. I had no idea what I had just gotten myself into. I learned a lot of things between now and then so I felt compelled to share them with you!
- Chicks don't dig sporadically growing facial hair. I broke up with my girlfriend of five years all because of my facial hair! (OK so maybe that wasn't the reason)
- There is a strip on my face where the hair doesn't grow. It looks like Moses parted the Red Sea on my face.
- I have the facial hair growth rate of a 12 year old italian boy.
- The hair directly under my nose grows in a lot fuller than on the sides. Naturally giving me the appearance of the Hitler mustache.
- My mom might have slept with the mail man. For some reason I have red hair in my goatee, even though there isn't a single person in my entire family with red hair.
- When I let my facial hair grow out and my hair is as long as it is a lot of people call me Jesus! (Having a shirt that says "Jesus is f'ing METAL" doesn't help either)
- My mustache and hair make me look like a young Ron Jeremy.
- I found entirely too many ways to fidget with my facial hair. Being able to put my chin hair in my mouth is not something to be proud of.
- When you think you finally look bummy enough to take the picture Murphy's Law will kick in and make you wait another 2 weeks to get the pictures finally taken.
- Trying to explain to everyone you know why you haven't shaved and look like crap can get extremely repetitive.
- When people see you walking downtown dressed as a bum walking around with a camera crew they have a tendency to stare.
- Jay introducing me to everyone he knows as "Some bum we found on the streets" makes people wonder.
- Real bums are far more dirtier than me, wear flannel plaid no matter how hot it is, and are scary. (I was afraid a bum was going to shank me over some turf war)
- Everyone has a bad driver's license picture, but when you lose your wallet and have to get a new one a week before the bum picture it's going to be really bad!! I'm talking about cousin Itt from Addams Family...
-Andrew
- Chicks don't dig sporadically growing facial hair. I broke up with my girlfriend of five years all because of my facial hair! (OK so maybe that wasn't the reason)
- There is a strip on my face where the hair doesn't grow. It looks like Moses parted the Red Sea on my face.
- I have the facial hair growth rate of a 12 year old italian boy.
- The hair directly under my nose grows in a lot fuller than on the sides. Naturally giving me the appearance of the Hitler mustache.
- My mom might have slept with the mail man. For some reason I have red hair in my goatee, even though there isn't a single person in my entire family with red hair.
- When I let my facial hair grow out and my hair is as long as it is a lot of people call me Jesus! (Having a shirt that says "Jesus is f'ing METAL" doesn't help either)
- My mustache and hair make me look like a young Ron Jeremy.
- I found entirely too many ways to fidget with my facial hair. Being able to put my chin hair in my mouth is not something to be proud of.
- When you think you finally look bummy enough to take the picture Murphy's Law will kick in and make you wait another 2 weeks to get the pictures finally taken.
- Trying to explain to everyone you know why you haven't shaved and look like crap can get extremely repetitive.
- When people see you walking downtown dressed as a bum walking around with a camera crew they have a tendency to stare.
- Jay introducing me to everyone he knows as "Some bum we found on the streets" makes people wonder.
- Real bums are far more dirtier than me, wear flannel plaid no matter how hot it is, and are scary. (I was afraid a bum was going to shank me over some turf war)
- Everyone has a bad driver's license picture, but when you lose your wallet and have to get a new one a week before the bum picture it's going to be really bad!! I'm talking about cousin Itt from Addams Family...
-Andrew
posted by MindComet at 10:10 AM
1 Critiques:
Poor Part-Time...
4:50 PM
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